Toothpaste —

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untitled-2Life skips along day-by-day. You purchased toothpaste recently, in fact three tubes and a bonus free. You’re in great shape now, toothpaste is off the radarscope for some time and life skips along one tube at a time. Brushing your teeth may not be at the top of the list of things you really like to do, but you do it because the twice a day foamy mouth negates consequences. So life skips along but the day arrives when you reach for the fourth tube and as you hover over the sink looking like a rabid dog your inner voice alerts you that you will eventually “run out.” No problem, the tube is full, there’s plenty of time. And life skips along and the tube gets lighter and lighter. In fact, you’ve already begun to squeeze the tube up both sides. That’s nothing; you have started to press the tube against the edge of the sink as you glide your palm up the tube because it seems to better move what’s left to the tube orifice. Now let’s be completely honest, because skin is soft, you have actually used the edge of the plastic brush to put more pressure on the tube, amazingly all the tricks have worked. Oh, about the tube orifice, you have been reintroduced to the fact that the shoulder near the orifice is pretty firm, so in desperation all you can do now is stick the bristles into the hole to extract last remnants of the peppermint stuff. And we will not tell anyone that you retrieved the tube from the wastebasket once even though you made a mental contract with yourself to take action? So you’re finally out and have to do something – “Dear, can I borrow your toothpaste?”

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